Troy’s Story

“From Brokenness to Redemption: A Journey of Grace”

I grew up in a broken home with four brothers and three sisters. Violence—both physical and verbal—was a constant shadow in my childhood. My mother raised us, while my grandparents faithfully took us to church, where I learned Bible stories and heard about Jesus. Yet, as a child, I never embraced these teachings.

In my teen years, I felt different from others but didn’t understand why. Later in life, I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and dyslexia, which explained my struggles in school. I fell in with the wrong crowd, seeking acceptance where I could find it. With little guidance at home, I was easily influenced, leading me down a destructive path that landed me in a boys’ home. Despite my chaotic life, the story of Jesus lingered in the back of my mind.

The boys’ home didn’t fix me. As I grew older, I turned to alcohol and drugs, which consumed my life and freedom. My criminal behavior led to repeated stints in jail, and I reached a point where I didn’t care if I lived or died. In a moment of anger and desperation, I stabbed myself in the leg, hitting my femoral artery. Rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery, I came close to death. This near-death experience forced me to confront my reality: I didn’t want to die, but I knew I couldn’t continue living the way I was.

During my hospital stay, I met a woman who changed my life. She was kind, loving, and had an innocence that captivated me. Her influence inspired me to start changing. With determination, in my own strength, I managed to stay away from drugs, though I still drank occasionally. But just over a year later, tragedy struck—she died in a house fire. Devastated and filled with anger at God, I fell back into old habits. Still, her kindness and the lessons she taught me remained etched in my heart.

As time passed, I occasionally prayed, wondering if God was listening. The rock band Stone Temple Pilots came out with a song in 1993 called “Shine” that became one of my favorites because of the way it put into words what I was feeling. The first verse says; 

Give me a word
Give me a sign
Show me where to look
Tell me, what will I find?
What will I find? 

I  needed help.  I needed direction.  There had to be something more, but where could I even look?  And what would I find if I had the guts to look? Another verse says:

Love is in the water
Love is in the air
Show me where to look
Tell me, will love be there?
Will love be there?

I hadn’t experienced much love in my life, but that didn’t mean I had stopped  hoping I would find it.  

Psalm 33:5 in the Bible says, “The earth is full of the steadfast love of the Lord.” If this was true, how could I experience God’s love?  

 One day, I felt compelled to call a local Baptist church, where I met Pastor Shane. He opened the Bible and showed me what Jesus had done for me. Romans 5:8 says, “God demonstrates his own love for us in this, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”  Jesus, the Son of God, lived a perfect live and then died on the cross in my place, to pay the price for my sins so that I could be forgiven, cleansed, and filled with God’s love for me. I recognized my need for a Savior, repented of my sins, and accepted Jesus as my Lord. My life didn’t instantly become perfect, but it became different. I realized I couldn’t rely on my strength to change—only through God’s strength could I find true transformation.

Amazingly, the song “Shine” ends with hope!  After praying that heaven’s light would shine on him, the singer says with confidence:

I’m gonna let it shine
I’m gonna let it shine
Heaven’s little light gonna shine on me

And I feel the same way. I’m deeply grateful for God’s grace and that moment when I picked up the phone to call Pastor Shane. My hope is that this testimony speaks to anyone seeking a change. The same God who transformed my life can do the same for you.